Across the Universe: Modern romance (Valentine, schmalentine)
By Robin Fogel-Shrive —
“Valentine, schmalentine,” one of my students suggested as the title for my column this month.
I became aware of the dismal state of my love life recently at no other than the dentist”s office, when the receptionist earnestly informed me that the only available appointment for filling a cavity after school hours was on Feb. 14.
This option was in fact, fine with me, as I quickly checked my mental datebook, noting that I had no plans for Valentine”s Day, and even if something developed, having half of my face unresponsive with novocaine probably wouldn”t affect the quixotic mood of the evening.
I don”t have a very good history with this distinctive February holiday of cupid, cards and chocolate candy.
Actually, my sweetest memory is of my father bringing my brothers and me chocolate lollipops, which was especially nice, because it came from him.
Because my birthday is a few days away from V-Day, a long term partner came upon the grand idea that we celebrate a “combo day.” Anyone who has a birthday close to Christmas knows this fallacy of convenience and cost-effectiveness.
We feel cheated. “Combo schmombo!”
A student in another class inquired as to the historical background of Valentine”s Day as we planned a classroom valentine card exchange. I suppose my emotional detachment from this Hallmark holiday prevented me from recalling an adequate response, but I looked it up afterwards in the go-to source, Wikipedia.
While there are many historical references to religious figures and events, “the first recorded association of Valentine”s Day with romantic love is in Parlement of Foules (1382) by Geoffrey Chaucer:
“For this was on seynt Volantynys day
Whan euery byrd comyth there to chese his make.”
[“for this was Saint Valentine”s Day, when every bird cometh there to choose his mate.”]
This poem was written for the engagement of King Richard II of England, and his bride-to-be who planned to marry in May. Mid-February is not the time for bird mating in England, so one can think that Chaucer was perhaps thinking of saint”s day for Valentine of Genoa, which happens to be on May 2.
It”s not easy looking for romance in modern times. I had this conversation with my new hairdresser recently — the go-to sympathetic ear in all matters of significance. Lake County is not teeming with single adults and the thought of running into your ex”s online profile, and visa-versa, seems absolutely mortifying (awkward, to say the least)!
Maybe I will plan on celebrating Valentine”s Day in May myself, and commemorate Valentine of Genoa day, as the majestic Cobb dogwoods are blooming and the birds of England are finding their mates.
When my son Jack asked me what I was writing about this month, he offered some support from one of his favorite television shows, Discovery”s “Gold Rush” It seems that each episode concludes with the emphasis on hope — on finding that elusive gold — and maintaining the drive and eyes on the prize. This reminded me of the Neil Young song, Heart of Gold.
“Keep me searching for a heart of gold.
You keep me searching ?
And I”m growing old?
I”ve been a miner for a heart o” gold”
I”m more than happy to spend Valentine”s Day this year with some of my favorite students who do have hearts of gold.
And I think Jack and I will share a Valentine”s Day pizza and watch reruns of “Gold Rush” that evening. It may not be courtly love, but I certainly can”t complain.
Robin Fogel-Shrive teaches at Lower Lake High School and is the project director for The Lake County Big Read literacy program. She can be reached at rshrive@yahoo.com.
