By Kevin N. Hume —
Whether you support it or not, the freedom to love whomever one chooses was validated last week in San Francisco.
The ongoing legal battle with Proposition 8 is far from over, but three U.S. 9th Circuit Court of Appeals judges gave same-sex couples hope by declaring the law unconstitutional.
Opinions on gay marriage are staunchly polarized. But the tide seems to be changing toward tolerance. Same-sex marriage laws in Washington and New Jersey were enacted this week and Maryland”s governor is seeking support for same-sex marriage legislation.
It seems rare to witness such progress in a relatively short time. But even more surprising is how different perceptions are from nearly eight years ago.
Eleven states had gay marriage legislation on the ballot during the 2004 election, all of which defined marriage as between a man and a woman. All were overwhelmingly approved. Only in Oregon and Michigan did the anti-gay marriage ballot measures garner less than 60 percent approval. Prop. 8, which also defined marriage as between a man and a woman, passed in 2008 with 52 percent approval.
Perhaps we”re finally living in a time when love in all forms is finally getting the approval it deserves.
I suppose I can understand objecting to same-sex marriage on moral grounds. I don”t agree with the stance but I can understand it. What I can”t accept is folks who are unable to overcome those objections and let people love whomever they choose.
Why deny someone the opportunity to fully declare their love for their partner? What gives us the right to dictate who can and cannot marry?
I would argue the life goals of most people are to get married and have a family. We all should have that right, not just straight couples. The argument of reproduction as the basis for marriage is eroding over time as couples choose to have children without getting married and the rise of single motherhood.
Yes, same-sex couples cannot reproduce without outside help, be it adoption, the use of a surrogate parent or in vitro fertilization. But not all straight couples can reproduce without the same help. Do we deny them the right to have a family?
There are some that desire to “redefine” marriage and try to keep “traditional” marriage in place. But you can”t fight change. People are choosing not to marry for their own reasons. Why should we deny those that actually want to take the plunge? Much like other cultural mainstays, marriage is evolving. We should probably allow it to continue to do so because it”s inevitable. And allowing same-sex couples the right to marry will not invalidate the marriages of straight couples. That is a spiteful and ignorant viewpoint that has no basis in this discussion.
There have been many instances in history where people fought for the greater good. It always seems strange when judges and lawmakers lead the charge, such as with school integration and the Civil Rights movement. But it seems the citizenry often has trouble with these moral issues. I am glad when the establishment can rise above it all and take a stand in the issue of fairness for the better of society.
Love is love. It doesn”t have a particular look, a particular definition. It is almost inexplicable. To deny anyone of that basic human right is ludicrous. One day, I will find a woman whom I will marry and start a family with. I only hope the same can be said for my gay and lesbian friends in the future. Practice tolerance.
Kevin N. Hume can be reached at kevin.n.hume@gmail.com or call directly 263-5636 ext. 14.
