Letter to the Editor: What did you call it?
KELSEYVILLE — They ought to have naming conventions in Las Vegas where the reality makers and shapers can get together to name things to put their spin on.
It would certainly seem that we are being conditioned by doublespeak to accept a brave new world of smoke and mirrors crafted with cunning revisionism and disinformation while beguiled and bedazzled with a numbing onslaught of sensory distraction.
The deliberate misuse of words with the intent to mislead and deceive has entangled us in a web of doubt and disillusionment. To elucidate, I”ve listed some of the words and phrases I”ve personally grown very tired of hearing and attached my own translations.
Transparency: A one way window through which government can keep an eye on you.
Regulatory Agency: Something the FOX dreamed up while guarding the hen house.
Citizens United: Brought to you by the Koch brothers, the folks who gave you super pacs and unlimited corporate spending on political campaigns under the flag of Corporate Personhood. Its mission statement claims it is “dedicated to restoring the United States government to citizens” control and to assert American values of limited government, freedom of enterprise, strong families, and national sovereignty and security.” If you believe that, I have a bridge for sale that you might be interested in.
Patriot Act: An oxymoron.
Homeland Security: Government”s way of saying there”s a bogeyman in the closet but don”t worry, we”ll keep you safe. The scary guy police costs taxpayers more than $60 billion a year and nearly 7 trillion since the Department of Homeland Security”s inception.
I think the word security took on a whole new meaning when the people promising it became the ones we ought to be concerned about especially when we”re expected to relinquish our basic rights and freedoms in return for the illusion of security. We”d do well to remember the words of Benjamin Franklin who said, “Those who would give up essential Liberty, to purchase a little temporary Safety, deserve neither Liberty nor Safety.”
Coordinated effort: An expression of affection between the FBI, the CIA and Halliburton that manifests in martial law.
Friendly fire: Not so friendly when you”re hit by it. When you”re shot, you”re not thinking, which friend should I cross off my Christmas list?
Collateral damage: A very bad euphemism for killing innocent people while aiming at others.
Theatre: That”s a term the Pentagon adopted for an area of major military activity. Not a word I”d choose for anything having to do with war. For me the theatre is a place to enjoy a play or movie.
Austerity: A Plutocracy”s equivalent to the guillotine when applied to the working class.
Smart: Smart this and smart that. There”s even smart water and smart toilet paper. Water that makes you smart? Toilet paper that knows where to go? We”ve never seen so many “smart” products and services. They want us to get so used to the word smart and so comfortable with it that we”ll want to get chummy with anything named smart. Ya dumb em down and ya sell em smart. Not such a bad idea when you”re rolling out a “Smart Grid.” Today”s Exercise- Look around and tell me how many common everyday household items you find with the word “smart” in it. Don”t you find that interesting?
Green and Greenwashing: Was that one invented by Alan Greenspan as a ploy for laundering dirty money? On not such a different note, remember BP, the company that gave us the largest oil spill in history?
Remember the black beaches? BP”s changed its image. They”re gone green. You can tell that to the birds. BP is eco-friendly. Their corporate branding has a green and yellow starburst over their pumps but true to their real colors, in March of this year, their Alaska subsidiary spilled over 200,000 gallons of crude oil near Prudhoe Bay, the largest North Slope spill ever. A Federal grand jury is investigating the spill caused by a rupture in a corroded pipeline and may bring criminal charges.
BP has denied that it acted negligently just as they did at the time of the Deepwater Horizon Spill in 2010. If history is our guide, they”ll get a hand-slapping and have another go at corporate re-branding to once again repair BP”s-earth friendly public image.
Spin isn”t necessarily a new thing but it”s got more punch then ever. When I grew up, clothes spun around in a dryer and you could buy spun cotton candy on a boardwalk though everything that was spun wasn”t that innocuous then either. You may remember phrases like, “Trust Me” and “Would I lie to you?” Most of us know the answer to that question.
I love language. You can tell a lot about a person by the words they use. I”m also fond of mixed metaphors. One of my favorites was Al Gore in referring to George Bush when he said, “A zebra does not change its spots.”
Howard Glasser
Kelseyville
