January is a great time to set goals. As an educator, I want our all students to achieve at their highest potential, but more importantly, I want them to be healthy and happy human beings. Sometimes, in the race for good grades or in trying to please teachers and parents, students struggle to find a healthy balance. As adults, we sometimes forget that the events in a student’s life that seem like no big deal to us can feel overwhelming or even catastrophic to them.
So, one of my 2020 goals is to pay even more attention to signs that may indicate our students aren’t coping well with emotional stressors and to do what I can to provide resources so they feel supported. To that end, I did a little research and here’s what behavioral health professionals recommend, in case you’d like to join me in this endeavor.
Be a good role model by managing your own stress well
Children learn from our behaviors. When we are stressed out, our children are too. We need to take care of ourselves—get enough sleep, exercise, eat healthy, and take breaks from the craziness when our nerves are frayed. Since it is sometimes hard to recognize when we’re getting to the end of our rope, it can help to have a code word with our significant other or good friends to let us know when we need to step back and recharge our batteries.
Maintain routines
Kids (and adults) do better when they can depend on healthy daily routines. As much as possible, keep bedtimes within an hour of normal and hold fast to bedtime routines. Do what you can to eat meals at about the same time every evening and try not to allow any screen time during meal time.
Manage expectations
Although we cannot predict the future, if you know your child’s life is going to be upended somehow, do what you can to let him or her know what to expect at an age-appropriate level. That way, they can ask questions and better manage expectations.
Stay active
A great way to relieve stress is physical activity, so even if it means going out in the rain, it’s worth the effort. Put on raincoats to go splashing in puddles. Search for salamanders. If your kids are old enough, send them on an outdoor scavenger hunt. Exercise provides us with stress-reducing hormones, unlike sitting in front of a TV or gaming console for hours at a time.
Spend time together
Planning activities that involve interaction makes everyone feel more connected. Bake cookies. Build with Legos. Play board games. It doesn’t matter what you do as long as you get to talk with each other.
Consider doing something as a family that helps others
Volunteering to help those less fortunate than ourselves helps us all appreciate the good things in our lives. It also teaches our kids the powerful impact of kindness. Having children pick out a gently used toy to give away or an article of clothing to donate helps teach generosity. Activities that promote gratitude help reduce stress and make most of us feel better all the way around.
Helping Teens
Once children become teens, the causes of stress often expand to what’s going on in the world around them. Here’s a great article from Psychology Today with some concrete recommendations on how to help teens navigate our complicated world (www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/advice-your-best-life/201912/helping-stressed-out-teens). In short, it’s best to listen, make sure your teen has no underlying medical problems, encourage them to diagnose their stress, and let them know where their stress is healthy and normal.
While academic achievement is great, it isn’t everything. If there’s some way you feel Kelseyville Unified can help students better manage their stress, please let me know.
